I Tri and Craft

thoughts from a mother of boys, a marathoner, a triathlete, a crafter, a wife, and a scientist

Category Archives: Parenting


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My Curve Ball

Earlier this week I had the boys in the car (a ’97 4Runner) with me on our way to the Wonderful-Sitter’s house.  Sid in his infant car seat (clicked into the base) on the passenger side and Ian in his toddler car seat on the driver’s side.

I was headed south down a road and there was a white minivanish vehicle sitting at the stop sign on a side street.

The next thing I know I was jolted like a pinball on the passenger side.  I look over to see coffee flying everywhere and splattering on the windows, the seats and all over our stuff.

My car goes sailing across traffic to the east side of the street, where I might have hit the sidewalk, and I pull to a stop on the shoulder.

I jump out of the car and run around to Sid’s side to see his car seat tilted on its side, base and all.  It was still buckled in, and not completely sideways because Ian’s car seat stopped it.

I had to unbuckle it to get it upright again.  Ian asks “what happen?” with no fear or concern.  I assessed the kids looking for any injuries asking Ian over and over again if he was hurt.  “I fine mama, I feel good, I not hurt.”

Sid was crying and I tried to calm him, but didn’t want to take him out of the car seat.  It was cold and there was a slight drizzle, plus I wasn’t sure if he was hurt and didn’t want to do anymore damage.

I was furious!  I couldn’t believe someone was so careless!  That feeling didn’t last long though, it quickly turned to shear and utter relief.  Everyone was OK, no apparent injuries.  (the verdict is still out on me, I have a lot of neck and shoulder pain which is giving me bad headaches)

AutoAccident

The other car was finally able to cross the street and come over to us.  I didn’t ask for an explanation about what happened.  I knew what happened, he pulled out as I was driving by (see above diagram).  His car hit the front corner on my passenger side, then scratched the back door and hooked on my rear wheel well.  It doesn’t matter why he pulled out, just that he did.

We exchanged information and I called in the claim.  I could tell he felt bad about what happened, it was a mistake.  A bad careless one maybe, but still just a mistake.  When I was on the phone with the insurance agent I would look over at him and I could see it on his face that he was mortified about hitting my car.  Right then and there, I forgave him.

When I looked at my car I thought it was driveable so I took Ian to Wonderful-Sitter’s house and took Sid to the urgent care clinic (all within a mile of the accident).  While Sid had no apparent injuries I just had to be sure.  I couldn’t just ask him if he was hurt.  When I was talking to the insurance agent Sid kept crying, and he threw up, so I wanted to get him looked at.  He got a clean bill of health, with the exception of some spots that might have turned to bruises (but they didn’t).  The boys had a follow-up appointment with their pediatrician the next day.

As it turned out, my car was not driveable.  I could tell something was wrong so my sister came to get Sid and me from the urgent care clinic.  My car was towed to an auto body shop and declared TOTALED!  Unfixable.

Now I have to car shop!  Ugh. I am not looking forward to this.  I hate looking for a new car.  I should be happy, maybe I can get a minivan now….

When I drive the boys now I have this anxiety that runs through me.  No matter how good of a driver I am, there are just some things beyond my control.  I fear for their safety, although it hasn’t made me super paranoid, just more cautious.

It is always scary when you get in to an accident, but it much worse when your kids are in the car with you.

 

Happy & Safe Driving

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Life Throws a Mean Curve Ball

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No matter how we prepare for life, it has a way of surprising us. My surprise came this week. Which means I have had a whole bunch else to deal with and the series I wanted to write about has been put on hold. Hopefully I will be able to finish it, but I also have so much else to write. Happy trails to you


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How to Potty Train Boys

OK, so I don’t have an easy answer for this topic.  I did lots of reading and research on this topic.  Nothing helped me.

My oldest son is two and a half years old.  Last fall, when he was about eighteen months old, we started introducing the toilet to him.  I would put him on the toilet and we would sit there singing songs or reading books till he went and then I would point out to him what he did.

I would then talk to him about it while changing his diaper and suggest he use the bathroom instead.  This worked and I was very hopeful for potty training success.  But then the Christmas holidays came and we got busy so potty training went on the back burner.

So when the new year came we started again.  Then he would refuse and flip out when I tried to put him on the toilet.  I knew  couldn’t force it because that would only make it worse for him.  So we took a break.

For the next six months or so he would sometimes be ok with it and sometimes not.  One day in the spring he didn’t want to wear a diaper, since he was staying home with my mother-in-law I let him.  I don’t know what happened that day, but he wouldn’t use the toilet for months after.

As the summer came nearer I really wanted to get him trained, especially since the new baby would be here in Sept.  My son is a very stubborn boy, if I pushed him too hard he would rebel.  So we had to talk about it all the time and when we stayed home for the day I would put him in big boy pants.

Everyone would tell me that it is ok he is not trained, boys are harder than girls, or their kids weren’t trained till three, or he just isn’t ready yet.

I didn’t believe any of those reasons.  He knew what was going on.  He knew when he had to go to the bathroom, how to hold it if he wanted to.  The problem was me.  As much as I disliked changing diapers, it was much more convenient then taking him to the bathroom all the time.

I couldn’t take the time off work to stay home with him because I was going on maternity leave soon.  I decided to wait till I was on leave to train him.

One Monday I decided it was time.  From the time he woke up till the time he went to sleep he wore big boy pants and we didn’t leave the house.  He did great.  It only took a couple of days for him to figure it out.

When he would have an accident we would talk about it, clean him up and change clothes.  I would then remind him to tell me when he has to go.

We had some accidents, and we still do every once in a while, but over all he is trained.  I still put him in a diaper for bed time at night, but when he is still awake he tells me when he has to go, and sometimes he wakes up to tell me.

I still constantly ask him if he needs to go, because sometimes he forgets and gets sidetracked.  He isn’t a master at holding it yet.

For me I think potty training is different for everyone and if you trust the kid then they will know when it is time.  I also learned patience is necessary.


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Daily Thanks Day 18

Today I am thankful for indoor pools at rec. centers.

Image from the Portland Parks and Recreation website

Yesterday was a typical Pacific Northwest fall day.  Cold, big, thick drops of water falling from dark gray cloud covered skies.

My toddler was getting a bit antsy staying inside so when my cousin called to tell me she was taking her daughter, who is only a week older than Ian, swimming I jumped at the chance to go.

The kids had a blast and burned off tons of energy.  Ian went down the big red slide, but only once.  He didn’t like the fact that we go under water at the end.  He said it scared him, but there was the little kid slide with a shark on it.